Master helped me walk through struggling paths of cultivation
By Kok Weng Chiang
Dear respected Master and fellow practitioner,
Along my path of cultivation, I could always sense Master’s merciful protection and care. Today I would like to share some of my experience in cultivation.
1.The Process of Obtaining The Fa
I bought a pirated copy of “Zhuan Falun” in a book shop and finished reading the whole book in a very short period. The content of the book is so amazing. I couldn’t believe I was so lucky to obtain the Fa. Although I couldn’t fully grasp the content of the book after reading for the first time. I believe what “Zhuan Falun”tells is true. The quality of the pirated copy is very bad, a few pages in the middle of “Lecture Six” is blank. After I finished the whole book, I replaced the blank page with the right content I downloaded from the Falun Dafa website.
“So once you decide to read the book for the first time, you must read it from beginning to end without letting up.”Lecture at the First Conference in North America
The first round of reading “Zhuan Falun”,I missed a few pages, it caused some interference in my cultivation in the later period. I read the missing page after download from Falun Dafa website.
2.My Faith towards Master and Dafa, A New Beginning for Cultivation
During a test, I encountered the phenomena of “Lecture Six” such as “Demonic Interference in Cultivation”, “Demonic Interference From One’s Own Mind”. An ordinary person might think that Iwas mentally abnormal. However, I’m very clear thatit’snot me. I worked very hard to fight against it but my power was very weak. Various kind of external messages messed up my mind. I can’t differentiate which is right or wrong, flooded with information from everywhere.
The condition was getting worse, my main consciousness appeared to be unclear, almost sleepless for one or two days. My mind remained to be in a mess, emotionally unstable, physically in a mess as well, cannot even complete my work during day times. Until one day, my mental and body have reached the limit, my heart beat is increased, breath is increased, my hand and limb getting weaker, main consciousness become blur, I cant send righteous thought. I immediately pickup “Zhuan Falun”, repeatedly reading “Lunyu”, until my body recover become normal.
One night, I had a real dream, the trend of Fa rectification is very fast. In summary: My cosmos(body) destroy gradually as not cultivate up to requirement of Fa. The process of demolish is full or regret, suffer and frightening. Content of “Lunyu” was removed from my memory. At certain point I still remember “Falun Dafa Is Good, Zhen Shan Ren is Good”. At the last stage I only remain fraction of memory of the word “Faith on Master, Faith on Dafa”. Suddenly I heard Master (not original quote) voice said, “I doesn’t want to leave any of you behind.”
“Lunyu” appeared in front of me and highlighted “It was Dafa that created time and space”. The whole cosmos is rectifiedand I am reborned. All sentient being express gratitude on saving by Dafa same as in “Foretelling the Fa’s Rectification of the Human World”in book“Essentials for Further Advancement II”. I woke up in the morning, cultivation have not end, I still have chance. I understand that time is up, but Dafa created time for me to do better. My power is gone and I restart again as a new practitioner. But I was in a very fast forward time dimension where I feel clearly every single of bad thought is removed and my mind being cultivated. The level increase rapidly in a fast pace. After this I back to normal cultivation mode. Master said in Teaching the Fa at the 2004 International Fa Conference in New York, “Even if you haven’t done well, no matter what, Master still doesn’t want to leave any of you behind.”
I know I am doing badly previous, fall badly. But I will stand up and keep moving. I appreciated Master gives chance and time for me to catch up what I have lag.
3.Breakthrough Karma Sickness
After this incident, I quit all Dafa projects, to calm down my thoughts. In the past, because I did not practice the exercise diligently, my body getting skinny, misinterpreted the Master saying of“The reason being, with these exercises, you can do them more when you have the time, and you can do them less when you don’t. Master has told you about this.”Teaching the Fa at the Meeting with Asia-Pacific Students. For a long period, I was doing Dafawork with exhausted body and mental. I do less exercise, and felt burnout.My heartbeat increase, I felt tired and hungry no matter how much I rest how much I eat. With the pressure from family I was forced to see the doctor and take medicine, but then stop. The process of taking medicine then stop then take medicine repeated few times. In fact I did not let go the attachment of sickness. My action proved I have let go the attachment, in fact I didn’t in my mind.
First step, I rewatch Master exercise teaching video, restudy the instruction of sending righteous thought. I focus and study Fa more diligently. From time to time, practitioner will help me to correct my incorrect posture of exercise, gradually increase my time of exercise. I removed my bad habit of laziness and unserious attitude of studying Fa. For the whole year my body is in good condition.
However,recently my body was suffered unbearable uncomfortable almost every nights, I woke up a few times in the middle of the night, with difficulty of urinate. It was extremely suffering. I picked up book to study Fa, my condition getting better. The condition continue and repeated for some days which my will power of was getting thinner. I went to see doctor to check up, the doctor said there is nothing wrong with you and just go back. Out of unexpected, I suddenly realise I am Falun Dafa practitioner, I don’t want to see doctor. In fact, my body still in uncomfortable condition. However, I observed after each time of unbearable situation, I feel I am changing new skin, my body is very comfortable. Obviously, this is not the state of sickness but false impression. After a series of breakthrough, it is remained very less now, I can send righteous thought to destroy the false sickness once it appear. I always felt the arrangement and enlightenment of our compassionate Master. It allowedlower enlightenment quality such as me, gradually improve from unable to do until able to do it.
4.Joining Tian Guo Marching Band
I am joining Tian Guo Marching Band as first batch member in 2007. My instrument is trumpet. As I remember the first group practice is beside a lake, I heard trumpet from far. Then the practitioner let me tried the trumpet. I don’t like it, because it consists of 3 buttons. I think it is too easy for me and can’t produce complete sound with 3 buttons. I like flute which look cool with a lot of buttons that match me. In fact I am embarrassed of my thinking, as trumpet have wide sound range. It is the most difficult instrument in the band and Master is playing trumpet as well.
At the beginning, there was band practice almost every day. Within a month, my skill improved rapidly. I think the basic laid at that time help me to during my difficulties I encountered afterwards. After too many time of performance I become numbness. My improvement is saturate and performance drop. Later my body become weaker, I can’t even practice properly each time. Often I am very sad during performance, because lack of practice.Sometimes I am not able to play the notes, forgot the melody. After thatI gave up and not joining Tian Guo Marching Band.
After one or two year, I re-joined Tian Guo Marching Band. We participated in a large band competition. Our band made the first place as Champion. At that time, we all looked at each other and said: “The organizers seem to announce the first prize belong to Tian Guo Marching Band, am I hear it right?” Everyone frozen for a few seconds before cheering. Taking the championship for the first time, I think Master is encouraging me for my efforts.
After coming to New York, I was able to participate in the local Tian Guo Marching Band. Master always give the best for his disciples. When I first joined the group practice, more than one hundred people played the Dafa song at the same time. The music was very moving and sacred. At that time, I felt honoured. We have a good trumpet teacher to teach us, as well as world-class Shen Yun grade conductor to teach us, my trumpet skills to improve quickly. Through the period, my understanding of the theory of music, the orchestra, the correct method of practice, the rhythm, the standard, the importance of basic skills, improve tremendously. In this positive environment with a lot of Dafa disciple, I have broken the notion that I had previously obstructed my progress. For example, in the past I thought I was busy with many projects. We tried our best to practice and Master would bless it and we wait for miracle from Master. It was wrong attitude and mindset. I realized that in fact the music was teached by divine to human, she has a systematic practice and basic skills, coupled with our diligent practice in order to achieve the standard, there is no shortcut. I realized that the shortcut mentality, attitude of waiting miracles by Master, influenced all aspects of my cultivation and work. After I realized it and rectify those mentality and attitude, I made a great breakthrough in my later cultivation.
- Distribute Shen Yun flyers
I participated in the promotion of the Shen Yun performance and Shen Yun Symphony Orchestra. Even though I am doing some simple task, I felt very sacred. I found the feeling of cultivating with the heart I once had. We distribute Shen Yun leaflet at the particular entrance and at the beginning or the end of a particular show. Coincidentally, my workplace is very close to the theater. I rearrange my rest hour with my colleagues to distribute Shen Yun leaflet when I was not that busy. In fact, I didn’t do very well, just managed to distribute one or two leaflets at the beginning. I learnt from other fellow practitioners to be more proactive and on how to distribute Shen Yun leaflet faster. Although I managed to distribute more and more through time, it is still not as good as compared to other fellow practitioners.
When there are still a few days left from the actual show, we will be distributing leaflets at the Times Square tourist spot. I have to work at noon, therefore I took the morning shift. There are several days whereby the weather is very cold, not many people came out. It is tough, I merely managed to distribute one leaflet in an hour. Master will encourage me by leading me to meet with a few of my colleagues, I gave them leaflets, briefly introduce about Shen Yun.
There was once when I was working, a fellow practitioner called me and asked me about Shen Yun leaflets. After I hang up the phone, my Chinese colleague asked me why would I have the Shen Yun leaflet. I took the opportunity to clarify the truth to her. Though she cannot fully accept after listening to me, she could still understand some of my points. Actually the Chinese are very good at watching a person’s every mood. My eloquence is not that good, therefore, the way I clarify the truth is to lead them to find out that I am practicing Falun Gong and find opportunity to clarify the truth when the time is ripe. And I shall always be treating myself as a true practitioner and do well.
- Cultivate Attachment of Fear
Before cultivation l have very strong attachment of fear. Remember my first read of Zhuan Falun mention that fear is also an attachment, but still don’t understand why it is an attachment. Personal feel that fear is my inborn characteristic. After a long period of cultivating, fear attachment still keeps on. A lot of times I was avoiding and refusing to face reality. I just want to live in comfort. As Master said in Teaching the Fa at the Meeting with Asia-Pacific Students, “To put it lightly, you are lazy. Put more seriously, you’re afraid.“ l realized the attachment of comfort nourish my attachment of fear. A period of time my body appears as state of sickness. I am very worry. Every part of my body appeared as different symptom of sickness. And the symptom was similar as the practitioner who had passed away. There l remember Masters Fa said “The more you fear it, the more it will appear like a sickness. This attachment of yours must be removed. You will be made to learn from this lesson so that you can remove your fear and improve.” Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun. After understanding from the Fa, I let go of my fear attachment, those symptoms disappear immediately.
One time, l distributed Epoch Times newspaper in a mall, suddenly the emergency alarm for evacuation. I ran quickly. I wasafraid of terrorist attack. (because there is a lot of this news reported recently) My fear caused my body weak and heart beat rapidly. Eventually, it is just a small fire that cause the emergency alarm.When I went home that day, I feel sad, because of the fear of attachment, I escaped on my own and did not inform the people around me to flee. After I realized that it was attachment of fear. I try to change myself from attitude of avoiding problem to attitude of dare to facing difficulties. I firmly believe inDafaand the fear of attachment disappear eventually.
These are just personal experience of my Dafacultivation. I am writing this sharing to summarize my cultivation,to remind myself of cultivating diligently, and be grateful to the merciful of Master saving.
Thank you, Master.
Thank you fellow practitioner.